How to spend $450 at Walmart in less than an hour.

1. Get your oil changed. Get suckered into the promos they've got going on about cleaning this, or replacing that, or whatever. Decide to do your shopping while you wait.
2. Write an insanely long list of everything absolutely possible that your house is out of.
3. Acquire a new puppy who requires food, bedding, toys, treats, clothes, leashes, etc.
4. Have a kid who still wears diapers for naptime and bedtime.
5. Said kid also needs shoes, socks, undies, and winter gear.
6. Begin perusing every aisle of Walmart. Check things off of your list as you acquire them.
7. Throw in little extras you may or may not need or just plain don't need whatsoever.
8. Realize your house needs cleaning supplies, paper towels, garbage bags, etc. Go get them.
9. Get your sick kid and sick husband sprite, propel, gatorade, popsicles, coloring books, and saltines.
10. Buy random crap for yourself. New face lotion, different deodorant, air fresheners because it MATTERS TO YOU what your house smells like. 5 magazines. A bouquet of flowers.

Go to the register and pay for your super duper oil change. Ok so that was about 40 bucks with all the bells and whistles. Now pay for all your merchandise that the cashier gently suggests you need two carts for. Cough up the remaining $410 and silently die a little because you are feeding "The Man" the Sam Walton assholes of this world who sell you your goods on the backs of thirteen year old child slaves. Go home and unpack and put away all your goodies.

Then recycle the bags.

That's how to spend $450 at Walmart.

Yuck.

Chatterbox Sara