Fiber Pudding Cups

So this last week when I was grocery shopping, I noticed more and more things that typically never have fiber in them have "Live-Active Cultures" or are "Now with Fiber!". I had to stop and ask myself, what is up with America? Are we all really having that hard of a time going to the bathroom? I mean, yes fiber fills you up better, yes it lowers calories, yes it does so many good things, but the reality of it is that FIBER PUSHES POOP OUTTA YOUR BUTT. I suppose if you think about it logically, the more you go to the bathroom and have healthy, normal bathroom experiences, the healthier you are. I mean, it is getting rid of all the nasty gross stuff inside of you right?

I did a little research on this and also watched a marathon on BBC of You are Eat or whatever that show is called, where the lady scientifically analyzes the poop of unhealthy people and decided that apparently, pooping really is probably America's number one health concern. We're all fat, we're all slovenly, we all eat McDonalds, and consequentially apparently, we all have hard time of it in the bathroom. Going too much, going too little, whatever it may be, fiber is this decades new fixer-upper.

I can't wait for the serious fad diets to start in about this. EAT 100 GRAMS OF FIBER A DAY AND LOSE TEN POUNDS A WEEK! Celeb diets where all these toothpick actresses do is consume bran buds and yogurt culture and Smart Water and talk about how they've "never felt better" in interviews that strangely never leave the starlets bathroom.

Ok, so according to the American Medical Association guidelines I read, and to the Food Pyramid, and to most legit doctors, adults should be consuming between 35-55 grams of fiber a day. But MOST of them recommend that this not just come from things like "27 grain fiber enriched wheat bread!" or "flax seed oat kernel honey toasted cereal- 20 grams of fiber per serving!" but rather you know, actually following guidelines of getting a lot of fiber from fruits and veggies. Consequentially, eating lots of fruits and veggies also ups your water intake too and keeps you better hydrated than any Smart Water can probably ever do for you.

I'm all for sneaking in ways to be healthy. But tonight as I tried the new Jello Dark Chocolate pudding with "Live Active Cultures and 5 grams of fiber per Sugar-Free Serving!" I couldn't help but wish for an apple with peanut butter or berries and yogurt or something that I knew that the fiber and good stuff I was getting from it was all natural. It just felt like eating and like it was really getting around the point that good eating is usually healthy, natural eating. I felt the sugar alcohols in the jello not satisfying my craving and instead of that damn apple I actually wanted, I ate some damned Doritos then cursed myself for being an unhealthy idget who will probably end up with major pooping problems like those people on What Not To Eat.

Maybe I am on the brink of my own food revolution. All I know is that I don't really think you can freeze dry and chemically create health. We all fall victim to it when perhaps the real answer is what all those granola crunching hippies said all along, get back to your roots and eat naturally. And I don't know how many things you can really add healthful benefits to and actually see any kind of real results. Like recently Pepsi and Coke both came out with soda with vitamins and minerals added! What? If you're drinking soda, are you real,ly thinking about vitamins and minerals? Probably the chemicals in your sugar water defeat the purpose of those danged vitamins and minerals ANYWAYS.

Sometimes this is all enough for me to go hide out in a cave forever but then I remember how much I like tv. Then I wonder how much fiber really helps me if all I do is watch dvr'd bullshit.

Peace out yo-

Chatterbox Sara