And I'm only 24

I hate to say it, but I think I'm getting old. In the past few weeks, I, or someone else, have managed to find 4 white hairs on my head. Not to gross anyone out here but tonight I found a white hair in my nose, the second such hair in two weeks. Am I prematurely aging? Perhaps. When I type for long periods of time I notice my fingers ache. I have to take breaks from the computer screen at work, even step outside because the harshness of the fluorescent lights tires my eyes. My back hurts after a long commute into the main office. I find myself wanting to take naps in the afternoon. What the hell is wrong with me?

There was a time, when I could sit in front of a computer and type away for hours working fervently on a paper due only days away. I would sit, all hunched over with a bottle of Mountain Dew or Pepsi, plugging away at the endless paragraphs that were soon to become my masterpiece. I could review scholarly articles with the best of them. I was efficient and fast. I was a paper spitting machine who managed to work in a short amount of time because I was a procrastinator. Now, it takes me a while to get something done. I have to pace myself. Overall, maybe this was inevitable. I was so used to doing things fast and at the last minute that since that part of my life is done for now, I find it difficult to do other things in the same manner. I fear that sentence did not make sense.

Who do I blame for this premature aging that I am experiencing? I blame you SESDAC. Screw it, I'm going to name you. I blame you for the long hours without relief. I blame you for the overnights, and all the heavy lifting. I blame you, for putting me in charge of others when I barely am in charge of myself. I blame you for not allowing me to have a social life. I blame you for decieving me at every turn. I blame you for all the unnecessary stress in my life. Had this been a job that I would have made a career out of, then perhaps I would have had a brighter outlook. Call this my catharsis. I was sitting back, looking at my former job. It wasn't so bad. I enjoyed working with my coworkers. I enjoyed the people I supported. What I DID NOT enjoy was the useless B.S. that went on.

Yep, I guess I'm pretty old. I find myself refering to people, probably my own age, as kids. I myself still am a kid. I think my next facebook post should be a video of my playing with my disco-dinosaurs that Sara gave me. I'll play with them at my desk at work to show you all just how busy I am. They'll all say, "hey, there goes Jim, the guy who loves to play with his dinosaurs. I think the reservation got to him" Speaking of reservation, I think my rez accent is coming along pretty well. If only you could hear it. I would definately make Sara and Kare proud. I learned that its all in how you accent. You have to say every work as if its the last word of a question. And you have to use slang words liberally. Its delicate. Perhaps one day I'll write a book on Modern American Indian Speech Patterns in a Social Context. Ever listen to rez radio? Its pretty sweet

I'm Off to keelee myself to sleep.